2014/05/21

Ochivaye Dreams 0 – Dream of Happiness of a Hong Kong girl 夢想專訪0 – 香港女生的快樂夢

She, grew up in a grass-rooted family. When she was little, her parents always told her to be a good student. What about after being a good student? No one ever told her. In school she was asked to write about “My Dream”, she only knew teachers through the school so she wrote she wanted to be a teacher. She thought of being a Kindergarten Teacher when she was in Primary School, because she could play games with the kids. Then she thought she wanted to be a Primary School teacher when she went to Secondary School, because Primary School kids seemed to be more mature. She wasn’t interested in being a teacher anymore when she was in University, because she was majoring in Social Work. She thought being a Social Worker was like a paid volunteer, she could just take the service users of different age groups to do all kinds of fun things, just like having holidays all the time.

She grew up in Hong Kong, never thought of studying or living overseas. Her parents always said these were the things done by the rich people only. “We are poor” was what she got from their words. In 2007 Christmas, she received a present from the Christians on the street, it was a Youth Magazine and there was an advertisement inside,

Do you wanna live overseas? Do you wanna stay with a foreign host family, and to study in a foreign country? One year, to be a foreign exchange student, come and join us…..

After seeing the ad, she was so excited. She never heard of cultural exchange before, she couldn’t study abroad or move overseas, but she could join a cultural exchange program and be an exchange student. She took the magazine and showed the ad to her mom in excitement, however, her mom responded calmly, “Go and sign up then.” So she decided to apply, she was so excited that night she couldn’t sleep at all, it was like she had already got the offer to start her foreign exchange journey soon. 

After submission of the forms, she was invited to attend an interview, at a school located in the HK Island. She could hardly remember what the details were like, some kinds of group interview, self-introduction in English, etc. She only remembered her English sucked, she didn’t even know what she was talking about. However, she got a notice from the Agency few weeks later, and she got the offer. She told her parents the good news, and she saw her mom was kinda shocked at that moment.

She started her 1 year journey to the US in Aug 1998. She remembered the HKCEE results were only out a few days before she left. All classmates were concerned about their grades, but not her, she already had a plan for her following year. She scored 12 in her HKCEE.

Aged 16, she went overseas by herself for the very first time in her life, and for one whole year. However, it changed her life, ever. She used to be a very quiet person, her English was bad, living overseas opened her horizons totally. How free it was to study overseas, photography and choir were formal classes, teachers allowed classmates to lie on the floor to read in the free time, there was an ECA called cheerleading when girls wore mini-skirts and danced and did pyramids.   

After one year, she became an extrovert totally. She realized she couldn’t speak properly in the US cos of her poor English. In HK, she could speak fluently in Chinese so she should speak up more often. She also repeated F.5 in her old school, and retake HKCEE. Her English result jumped 2 grades, while her Chinese result jumped 3 grades. She continued her schooling in the same school afterwards. She kept on signing up different ECAs, volunteerings, exchange tours, meeting new friends. Although her HKAL results weren’t good, she managed to get into Social Work in University through recommendation of her Secondary School principal. 

In the 3 years of her Uni. life, playing was always on higher priority than studying. She always went overseas in her long or short term-breaks, doing internships, volunteering, going for exchange tours. She met her Uni. career counselor in one occasion. He asked all classmates what their dreams and goals and plans were in the next 5 to 10 years, others answered earning certain amounts of money, getting to certain grades, working in certain big companies, etc. She, however, was not interested in any of those digits, she told the counselor she only wanted to be happy. She, however, was kinda hesitating in her heart if she was being too naïve to voice out that answer.  

Last semester of her Uni. life, she had the chance to go to National University of Singapore to be a foreign exchange student. She found out there was a Scuba Diving club, she then went to get her scuba diving license. She found out there was a Cheerleading ECA, she joined to be a member.

Finally it was time to graduate, she started to feel lost in her future. One day she had a crazy thought, she could find a job in Singapore in order to continue joining the Cheerleading ECA. So she started job-hunting in Singapore, and she got an offer, as a social worker. However, the post required her to work on Wednesday night, and did shift on alternate Saturdays, which clashed totally with the time of cheerleading practices. Her cheerleading dream fell apart. One day, she saw an ad. on the newspaper of Middle Eastern Bellydancing, how beautiful it would be to dance in those colorful and gorgeous costumes, she found her new hobby.   

After working as a Social Worker in Singapore for 2 years, she realized it wasn’t for her to have a stable social worker life. She found out the Airlines from the Middle East were doing recruitments in Singapore, she was attracted by their beautiful uniforms with shawls hanging down from the hats, and thought how nice it would be to work in the Middle East where she could learn the real Middle Eastern Bellydance. She started to attend all the walk-ins of different airlines, and finally got into Gulf Air, based in Bahrain.

After moving to Bahrain, she then realized Bellydancing was considered a sexy dance than an artform in the Middle East. It was only performed in Cruises or Night Clubs. She couldn’t find any group classes either, only 1-1 class. Her Bellydancing dream was broken again. On the other hand, during the cabin crew training she realized it was a very boring job to be a cabin crew. Just repeating all the checks, boardings, distributing meals, her brain was useless and would rust very soon. Moreover, life in Bahrain was boring, all the rich people did in their lives were shopping in the malls, having high tea in hotels, sunbathing and swimming in resorts, she could never live a life that way. She found a new hobby instead, kept on traveling overseas with her discounted flight tickets.     

After working in the airline for 2 years, she had a new thought again, she wanted to tour around the world. She realized in her short travels all the other backpackers had no job commitments. They could travel for months, and followed their hearts when visiting places, rather than covering all the sightseeings in a limited time. She also realized some life skills were a must to learn, like driving a car, her life was terrible without a car in Bahrain. She made up her mind to go back to HK to learn driving, and to spend a year to travel afterwards.

However, she found out getting a driving license was a very complicated matter in HK, lots of time spent on written exam, practicing driving, and taking the road exam. So she thought why not trying job hunting in HK, and see how the Social Welfare Industry was like at that time. She could also practice her interview skills. However, she got quite a few offers as a result.

She never heard of Outward Bound in her life, she thought there were only youth hostels in HK. First time seeing the OB website, she thought it was a job tailormade for her, as it combined both Social Work and Outdoor Trainings, it was her dream job. So she worked as an OB Instructor for 4 years, how fulfilling those days were.

Time flew in 4 years, as more than half of the time was spent with the participants. However, she helped the participants to discover their potentials, she stopped growing on her own. She knew it was time for her to continue her own journey. During those 4 years, she never went backpacking on her own, she knew she only wanted to start a journey with no commitments and no time limit.

On the Valentines’ Day of 2014, she started her journey. “If not now, when?!” She knew deep in her heart, she must finished her goal before her next goal will appear.

To look back her life experiences with the learning model in Outward Bound, all she wanted in her life was to live happily. Enjoy every single day, appreciate every single matter happened, and person encountered. And, to live out her life morals, let it be, be happy, here and now, regretless life.

She never forgot her trainings in Social Work, to her it is a lifestyle to help people to help themselves, she is just doing it in a different way.

Traveling, is my dream
This time
No more job commitment
The real Gap Year

One year
Going to different places
Meeting all kinds of people

And
Write down their life stories
Share with the whole world

This
is the dream I wanna achieve this year

Ochivaye Dreams

She found a little Chinese gift at home, she wanted to bring it with her in her journey, and used it to start exchanging gifts with the other dreams pursuers. So she could receive a lot of gifts, at the same time, giving out a lot of gifts.

夢想專訪0 – 香港女生的快樂夢

用外展的學習模式去回顧自己的經歷,女生的人生意義就是要活得快樂。好好過好每一天,感恩生活所發生的每一件事、在路上遇到的每一個人。然後,好好活出自己的座佑銘。


小時候的志願
她,生長在一個很基層的家庭。爸爸媽媽從小的教導就是要讀好書,她也不知道讀好書然後要幹甚麼。小時候作文「我的志願」,只認識老師這種職業,那就寫當老師吧。小學的時候女生想教幼稚園,因為可以一起玩遊戲;中學的時候想教小學,因為小學生好像比較會思考;大學的時候不想當老師了,因為女生跑去了唸社工,以為當社工是受薪的義工,還可以帶著小朋友青少年老人家一家大細去吃喝玩樂去參觀可樂廠動植物公園麥理浩夫人度假村,好不快樂的工作。

天使的禮物
在香港土生土長,女生從來都沒想過要到外國讀書或移民,因為爸爸媽媽說那是有錢人才會做的事,「我們家沒有錢」是女生了解那些說話背後的意思。1997年的聖誕節,在街上看聖誕燈飾卻收到了基督徒派發的聖誕禮物,裏面有一本「突破少年」,然後看到了裏面一則廣告:

你想到外國居住嗎?你想入住外國的寄宿家庭,在外地的學校讀書嗎?一年的時間,到外國文化交流和體驗生活,快來報名參加…….

看了這則廣告,女生心中突然莫名的興奮起來,從來都沒有聽過文化交流啊,不是去外國升學,也不是去移民,但可以去文化交流體驗外國生活啊!然後女生興奮地拿著雜誌跟媽媽說,媽媽卻淡淡然的回答:「那你去報名吧。」於是,女生決定要報名參加,那個晚上輾轉反側睡不著覺,心裏超級激動,就像已經申請成功一樣,為即將出發而興奮一樣。

交了報名表,被邀請出席面試,那是一間位於港島區的中學,面試過程已經不記得了,好像是小組圍圈面試,用英文自我介紹之類。總之,那時候女生的英文爛到不得了,都不知道自己說了些甚麼。想不到,幾星期後卻收到了通知,女生入選了。立即跟爸爸媽媽報告了喜訊,那時候,媽媽的表情好像有點驚訝。

影響一生的經歷
就這樣,女生在1998年八月初啟程到美國作一年文化交流生,還記得出發前數天會考才放榜,同學對自己的分數和前景都十分徬徨,女生卻沒有所謂了,因為已為自己的來年作出了安排。那一年,女生的會考12分。

就這樣,十六歲的女生第一次一個人出國,還要離開一個年頭那麼久。那一年,卻從此改變了她的一生。女生是一個超級內向的人,平時都不多言,英語又不靈光,在外國生活卻打開了眼界。原來外國讀書是那麼的自由,攝影課和合唱團都可以是正規課堂;當老師說自修時間同學可以伏在課室地上看書;還有,課外活動原來有啦啦隊這種玩意,穿著短裙仔跳舞叠羅漢。

脫胎換骨的女生
一年後回到香港,女生變得外向了,因為女生發覺,在美國的時候英語不好才不能跟同學溝通,在香港講中文應該多主動跟人交流溝通啊。然後,女生回到舊校重讀中五,第二次考會考,英文跳了兩級,中文卻跳了三級,成玏在原校升讀預科。回港後的女生,課餘時候不斷參加課外活動,不斷做義工,不斷參加交流團,不斷認識新朋友。最後高考成績不太理想,卻因為多元化的課外活動而成功得到中學校長的推薦入讀大學社工系。

在大學的三年時間,女生仍然是玩樂為主,讀書為次,每年的長假期短假期都不斷往外跑,到外地實習,到外地做義工,到外地參加交流團。在一次的實習當中,女生遇到了大學一位很資深的Career Counselor,他問大家五年內十年內有甚麼理想目標計劃,同學說要賺多少錢、升到甚麼級別、轉幾間公司,女生卻對這些數字完全不感興趣。女生跟Counselor說,她只想活得快樂。那時候女生心中還懷疑自己是不是有問題,為甚麼會那麼沒有大志。

大學畢業前的最後一個學期,女生有幸到新加坡國立大學當交換生。發覺人家大學有潛水學會,立即報名去考潛水牌;發覺課外活動有啦啦隊,又跑去一起穿短裙仔跳舞叠羅漢。

工作 是為了成就興趣
女生要大學畢業了,但是對自己的前路卻有點茫然。不知那裏來的念頭,原來自己真的很喜歡啦啦隊啊,為了能夠繼續參加啦啦隊,在新加坡做工也不錯啊。就這樣,女生開始在新加坡找工作,最後真的找到了一份社工職位。可是,工作卻要求女生星期三晚上返夜班,和隔週星期六全天當值,跟啦啦隊練習時間一模一樣,女生的啦啦隊夢就這樣破碎了。然後,女生看到報章介紹中東肚皮舞,色彩繽紛金碧輝煌的舞衣很美啊,於是,女生又找到了新的餘暇活動。

在新加坡當了兩年社工,生活太有規律了,女生發覺當社工都是不適合自己。看到中東的航空公司在新加坡招募空姐,在中東當空姐也不錯啊,制服還戴帽子圍絲巾很美啊,還有,到中東工作不是可以學真正的中東肚皮舞了。就這樣,女生很努力去參加不同的中東航空公司面試,最後成功考到了位於巴林的海灣航空。

到中東生活後才發覺,原來在中東肚皮舞是艷舞,只在遊輪或夜總會才有表演,根本沒有公開的純藝術的表演場合。女生也找不到肚皮舞的小組課程,只有上門的一對一授課,於是女生的肚皮舞夢又破碎了。另外,女生上空姐訓練班的時候就發覺,當空姐其實是很沉悶的工作,不斷重複又重複那些檢查、接待乘客、派餐,整個腦袋都不用思考運作的,這樣子下去的話腦袋很快會生锈的。還有,巴林是一個超級無聊的國家,到處都是有錢人,他們的生活就是逛商場、到酒店High Tea、到Resort游水晒太陽,無聊到極點。於是,女生找到了新的興趣,不斷買廉價機票去外地旅行。

當了兩年空姐後,女生又有了新的想法,她要去環遊世界。因為在那些短途旅行中,女生發覺其他背包客都沒有工作包袱的,他們的旅程是以月份來計算的,這,才是真真正正的旅行啊,隨著自己的心意而走動,不是按著景點時間來移動。另外,女生還發覺,有些全球性的技能還是必須學會的,像駕駛這回事,在巴林沒有私家車只能坐黃牛的士,生活超級不方便。於是,女生決定回香港考車牌,然後用一年時間環遊世界。
                         
回到香港才發覺,原來在香港考車是一件很煩複的事。考筆試一個時間,學車一個時間,考路試一個時間。既然如此,不如試一試在香港找工作,看看現在社福界的情況也好啊,還可練習一下自己的面試技巧。卻萬萬想不到,就這樣子找到了很多offers

女生從來沒有聽過Outward Bound這間機構,還以為香港只有烏溪沙麥理浩夫人度假村之類的宿營地方。第一次看到OB的網址,就覺得這是一份為自己度身訂造的工作,把戶外訓練和社會工作合併,不就是女生夢寐以求的工作嗎。就這樣子,女生當了四年外展教練,生活好不快樂。

四年時間過得很快,因為有超過一半的時間都在戶外和學生一起度過的。可是,雖然那是一份超讚的工作,幫助學生去發掘潛能,但當全部私人時間都給予學生,自己卻停滯不前時,女生知道是時候離職去繼續實踐自己的夢想了。那四年時間,女生沒有試過一個人背包旅行,因為她知道,自己需要的是一個沒有工作包袱沒有限期的長途旅程。

流浪 因夢想而啟航
2014年的情人節,女生終於啟程了。「有些事現在不做,就一輩子都不會做了」。女生知道,訂下了的目標,一天不實現,下一個目標同樣也不會出現。

用外展的學習模式去回顧自己的經歷,女生的人生意義就是要活得快樂。好好過好每一天,感恩生活所發生的每一件事、在路上遇到的每一個人。然後,好好活出自己的座佑銘:

順其自然
知足常樂
活在當下
今生無悔

女生沒有忘記社工的教導,因為助人自助是一種生活態度,只是換了另一種方式罷了。

流浪 是我的夢想
今次
不再有工作的包袱
真正的gap year

一年時間
到不同的地方
與不同的人相遇 相知 相交

然後
把他們的夢想寫下來
和全世界分享

這就是我
今年要成就的夢想

Ochivaye Dreams
夢想 成就

女生在家中找到了一個中式小掛飾,希望把它帶在旅途上,然後用它開始跟夢想專訪的追夢者交換禮物。最後,女生就可以收到好多好多份禮物,也可以送出好多好多份禮物。


17/05/2014
寫於斯里蘭卡HaputaleKandy的火車旅途上